Teacher: Why you didn’t do your homework?
Student: Sir, there was power failure so no light…
Teacher: You should light the candle then.
Student: Sir, there was no Lighter…
Teacher: Why you don’t have a Lighter?
Student: Sir, the candle was placed where we use to pray.
Teacher: SO.. you should take from there.
Student: Sir, I didn’t had bath…
Teacher: Why u didn’t took the bath?
Student: No water Sir…
Teacher: Why water was not available?
Student: Motor was not working!!!
Teacher: Stupid!!! Why the motor was not working?
Student: Sir, I have told you beginning itself there was no power!!!

Q: What do Berkeley and Stanford students have in common?
A: They both got into Berkeley.

Q. What’s the difference between a University of Alabama sorority sister and a scarecrow?
A. One lives in a field and is stuffed with hay. The other frightens birds and small animals.

Q. Whats the difference between Alabama and cheerios?
A. One belongs in a bowl. The other doesn’t!

Q. Did you hear about the Alabama quarterback who tried to throw himself on the floor in a fit of rage?
A. He missed!

Q. Why do Arizona students have TGIF on their shoes?
A. Toes Go In First!

Q. What do you get when you drive quickly through the Sun Devil campus?
A. An undergraduate degree.

Q: Why are rectal thermometers banned at Arizona State University?
A: They cause too much brain damage!

Q: Why don’t Arizona State Sun Devils fans let their kids play in sand boxes?
A: Because cats keep covering them up.

Q. Why do Razorbacks put a copy of their diploma in the window of their vehicles?
A. So they can park in handicap spaces.

Q. How do you get an Auburn student off your porch?
A. Pay him for the pizza!

Q. Why is Auburn always in the dark?
A. Because they’re afraid of Alabama Power.

Q: Why don’t Baylor University fans let their kids play in sand boxes?
A: Because cats keep covering them up.

Q: What do you say when you see a Bowling Green grad in a suit?
A: Will the defendant please rise!

Q: What’s the hardest thing about being an California Golden Bears football fan?
A: Telling your parents that you’re gay.

Q: What does the average California State University
student get on his SAT?
A: Drool.

Q: What should you do if you find three UConn football fans buried up to their neck in cement?
A: Get more cement.

Q: Why do they throw out a sack of manure at Drexel University weddings?
A: To keep the flies off the bride.

Q: Do you know why the Duke University football team should change its name to the «Opossums»?
A: Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.

Q: What’s the difference between an Florida Gators fan and a carp?
A: One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.

Q: Why don’t they have Christmas at FSU?
A: They can’t find a virgin and three wise men.

Q: What do you get when you cross an Georgia Bulldog and a pig?
A: Nothing. There’s some things that a pig will not do.

Q. What does Indiana University need to win a basketball championship?
A. A coach Kansas

Q. Why do they sell so many button-fly jeans in Lawrence, KS?
A. Because the sheep can hear the zippers a mile away.

Q. How did the Wildcat die from drinking milk?
A. The cow fell on him!


How many Wildcats does it take to change a lightbulb? None. Lava lamps don’t burn out man!

Q: How do you compliment an University Of Kentucky fan?
A: Nice tooth.

Q: What is the definition of safe sex down at the University Of Kentucky?
A: Placing a sign on the animals that kick…

Q: Did you hear about the fire in Louisiana State University’s football dorm that destroyed 20 books?
A: The real tragedy was that 15 hadn’t been colored yet.

Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the University of
Michigan campus?
A: A visitor.

Q: What do you get when you see blue and yellow?
A: Bruised.

Q: Why does Michigan have a big football stadium?
A: They have big heads.

Q: How do you kill a Wolverine?
A: Put it in an arena against a Spartan.